Friday, January 23, 2009

The Return

To running? No. To pain. Even though I had a great week, I have returned to sporadic pain in and around the break area of my foot. Once again, the superstitious part of me wonders if I jinxed my rehab by writing about it here. Common sense will tell me that one has absolutely nothing to do with the other, but I can tell you from experience that the mental side of an injury or anything for that matter, is very powerful.

I have been able to walk but running is still not an option. Skating is probably not an option at the moment and I am really fearful about how much longer this is going to drag on. This past Wednesday was 9 weeks since my diagnosis. Has it improved? Yes. I can say that with 100% certainty. But the fact that I still have issues frustrates me like absolutely nothing else I have ever been frustrated by in my entire life.

Everything is questioned. Everything is an issue. I should be glad I'm moving around. I know I should be happy I'm not bound to a walking boot and fortunately not in "constant" pain. For now, I am limited and unable to do either of my favorite activities (running and skating). I am in dire need of the running and it is probably going to be the last thing that comes back. Even though I have run on 3 occasions since the new year started, none of those events was for very long and none gave me any sort of satisfaction. It wasn't the running I knew. Much like the start of this injury, I sit and wonder a lot. When will I get back to the way it was? Harder yet to wonder; will I get back to the way it was? Perhaps my return is imminent. A return to a doctor's office?

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